Saturday, 20 December 2014

In Defence of 'Other People'


In his 1944 play 'No Exit' Jean-Paul Stare famously wrote 'L'enfer, c'est les autres', commonly translated into English as 'Hell, is other people'.

However, far from being ‘hell’, it strikes me that other people are oftentimes, ‘heaven’.

In the saddest moments of your life it is ‘other people’ who usually chase away your gloom. When you’ve been down on your knees for a long time it is generally other people who come along and set you back on your feet. It is other people who will show you that things are worthwhile, even when you haven’t been able to see any purpose in anything for as long as you can remember. Perhaps Satre should have written ‘Hell is some, but not necessarily all, other people’.

I was heading into middle age before I really understood that the shape of our lives is dependent upon other people. Far from being masters of own destiny we aren’t even the back seat navigators. It is other people and how they behave, how they think, what they choose to do and when they choose to do it that really molds our lives, for good and for bad.

I can pinpoint four or five periods in my life when socially, professionally, intellectually and spiritually everything seemed to be in place. During those very happy periods of my life things seemed to be rational, fun, exciting and interesting. Life brimmed with possibility. Much of this happiness was down to my own efforts at building a positive existence for myself; but the actual framework for that happiness was constructed upon the behaviour and attitudes of the other people with whom I was working, living, socialising and thinking.

There is no doubt that ‘other people’ can be a drag upon your hopes and ambitions, but equally ‘other people’ can be the pathway to you achieving a sense of worth and happiness that is far beyond what you ever thought possible. 


I suspect and hope that on my last day, when I realise that my time is almost up, I will spend my final moments being thankful for, ‘other people'.



No comments :

Post a Comment